After a Year

My summer this year transformed me into a better person. I was really blessed to become a part of the 3rd Young Women’s Camp on Gender Issues, Sexuality and Prostitution. I traveled on April 26, 2009 and went home on the 30th. I thought that everything would end the moment I step out from The Forest Camp, Apolong, Valencia, Negros Oriental but just before the summer ends I realized that the biggest challenge came after the camp was over. How could that five days I spent in that relaxing place with people I do not really know had affected the remaining days of my life?

Well, it all started with an unfamiliar e-mail. It was not just an ordinary e-mail.It was March 20 when I received a message from the Coalition Against Trafficking in Women - Asia Pacific congratulating me because I will be one of the participants who will be joining a certain camp. I remembered applying for it weeks ago. I remembered describing sincerely how I viewed women but I was really not expecting that I could be chosen. I was exhausted the whole day because it was the last day of our final examination but after reading the e-mail, my mood suddenly brightened. What a perfect timing! The e-mail message came together with my regular facebook and friendster updates but unlike them, I placed that particular message in a separate folder and I promised to myself that it will remain in there for as long as my account still exists. That was not just an ordinary e-mail. The scheduled date of the camp came and I found myself making use of every second as if there’s no tomorrow. Sunday evening, the night before the activity proper, we started getting to know each other. I met my fellow participants and we became friends instantly. I learned more than just their names and the places where they came from. I learned true lives. Each day, we continued gaining trust towards our group mates that we become so comfortable opening up the things that we don’t normally reveal even to our closest friends and family members. 

One of the first lessons I learned has something to do with a very remarkable woman, Teresa Magbanua. I was a member of the Teresa group. Ate Viola, our adult facilitator, told us who Teresa was and it was very flattering that we are named after the only woman who led combat troops in the Visayas against Spanish and the American force. How could I forget our presentation portraying a girl who loved to play with her two brothers, fight with her boy playmates, climb tress, swim at the river, and ride horses? The camp was a very good venue for us to analyze our personal struggles at home, at school and even within our own selves. It was during the camp when we were given our own ’special moments’ for us to laugh and to cry, to think and to decide. In the camp, I recalled again how the death of my father when I was fourth year high school has left me responsibilities which were never taught to me. I recalled how the Capuchin Tertiary Sisters have become very influential in my life. I recalled how circumstances had led me to take up Bachelor of Science in Social Work, a course I am not aware of and never even thought of. I recalled how I had fallen in love with the goals of the profession which is to promote social change and liberation of people. As such, social workers are change agents in society and in the lives of the individuals, families and communities they serve. I love doing those but I am doubting my capacity. We discuss needs, problems and solutions and in the middle of it all, sometimes I find myself asking if I could really do those stressful tasks. How can I work with people and families who have serious conflicts manifested by runaways, delinquency and violence? How can I protect the rights of others when I cannot even courageously fight for my own rights? Before, I don’t know what it was that stops me from completely embracing my desire to help others. It was during the camp that I was able to admit that something bothers me. The camp was special because it was in there that I was able to name the uneasy feeling I had for so long. Because of the camp, I realized that I was afraid because I am a girl. I am a girl who was made to believe that I am weak and that there are so many things I cannot deal with. I am a girl who will eventually forgot my ideals if I will be faced into danger. I had been a victim of stereotyping because this society has prepared limitations for me. I didn’t said I want to be good in doing household chores but because I am a girl, I should or else I would be labeled negatively. The things man and woman can do are already predetermined and there I was just receiving them all. I thought nothing was wrong about it but it was in the camp that I was able to analyze how various roles, behavior and attitudes that we obey has led to gender inequality. It was in the camp that I realized that we have the power to change what we have created.

I am already aware that many women are victims of domestic violence, discrimination, prostitution, trafficking, pornography, rape and sexual harassment. However, my knowledge ends in statistics and dictionary meanings. It was in the camp that I realized that a woman got stories to tell and that we are not just sample of the population. Many women have been put into business yet it is never them who profit. Those who have the control ruined the lives of women and innocent children and distort the essence of love, sex, relationship and marriage. It is a kind of business that transforms women into sports, objects or properties. Something is wrong because many people still regard prostituted women as criminals. Something is wrong because masculinity is not yet redefined for most. Something is wrong because women are still overly burdened by reproductive work. These are only some of the concepts I had learned from the camp. For so long, I had been comfortable submitting myself to what I had been accustomed to. I didn’t know that the right time to advocate for change has long come for all but only few responded. The 3rd Women’s Camp is like an invitation for me to respond to the call for change and not just become a conformer. Being a graduate of the camp seems to give me a go signal that the time to become a catalyst is now. The camp has changed me. Yet the change I had experienced was a process and so it encourages me to continue applying the principles I know I am only beginning to understand. I must follow-up my own experience of changing and let others be influenced too. It is something I love to do not because I’m obliged to do it but because it’s what I wanted to do and I am a part of it. There are so many roads for us to choose from. But being involved in the battle towards the empowerment of women is not a choice but a natural commitment we have for mankind. It is a kind of responsibility entrusted to us by God. I will promote the rights of women not because it was what is expected for a social worker to do but more importantly because I am a young woman bestowed with gifts and abilities. I am a young woman who has a place in the world equal to men. I need not to fear. I am a woman. Like Teresa Magbanua, I know that I am strong. If not, then I should have surrendered long ago.I am thankful to the Coalition Against Trafficking in Women for initiating the action towards change together with other groups and dedicated people. The efforts of Miss Jean and all the people behind the CATW-AP have redirected the lives of many victims and survivors. Their efforts have made the graduates of the camp aware and vigilant. Such efforts will really go a long way. Such efforts have inspired me. The testimonies of Beng and Kuya Gerald, the advices of Ate Viola, Ate Clydie and Ate Shally, the sharings of my group mates and the enthusiasm of the rest of the organizers and facilitators were all difficult to ignore. The touching words of Miss Jean and AteYen were difficult to just set aside. 

The three-day camp was over but my commitment in joining the stand of the coalition has just begun. We affirmed one another and the burning passion we individually possess become even powerful…Then we scattered and return to our separate places but we never stop traveling until our roads become one again… We parted our ways but our spirit still connects us. I know that the CATW-AP will never get tired rescuing women. I know that my fellow graduates will not stop telling more people who real men are. The camp has taught us not to just close our eyes before stories of abuse and violence. The camp has taught us to maximize our potentials. Life doesn’t just end in making decisions. Rather, what comes after every decision we make would really test us. The challenges waiting for us are risky but I know the benefits of triumphing on them will be all worth it. I thank the CATW-AP for making my summer extra-ordinary. I thank them for helping me become a compassionate yet courageous social worker someday. I thank the coalition for assuring me that I am great and beautiful. May the CATW-AP family grow bigger and bigger… It was getting late. I stared once again to that already familiar e-mail I kept in a separate folder and I was thrilled by the thought that sank into me…A year and years from now, another set and another more sets of young women will be receiving an unfamiliar e-mail from CATW-AP starting with the word “CONGRATULATIONS.” Even if it’s too early, I congratulate them too. Like me, their day will be brightened. Like me, their life will be changed. Like me, they will one day become a woman and when that moment arrives, I’m sure that like me, they will happily emphasize that the message that came together with their friendster and facebook updates one busy afternoon is certainly not just an ordinary e-mail.