And Then and That

As love becomes deepest
Emotions even at their slightest details
Are naturally highlighted
Leaving the lover to just succumb to the feeling
And cruise to that vacuum of hunger and yearning.
I am your lover.
Your imperfect and flawed lover
A lover so human
Can be resilient yet fragile
I am your lover
And I long for you.
Oh, I miss you to the nth time…
But there are just moments
That I don’t want to say ‘I miss you’
Because I found myself missing you more
And this is a terrible kind of missing
A kind of missing that makes me feel empty
A kind of missing that changes the pace of weeks
A kind of missing that leads to teardrops…
But missing you means loving you beyond comparison
And I could only think of all the simile and metaphor I know
But none of them will speak perfectly what I feel
Yet your love makes me seek the solace from poetry
Poetry in its freedom and flexibility
And you are my poem
You are my serendipity
A fulfilled destiny…
And I’ll never leave you
At your side, there shall I be always
You are God’s promise
And in times like this that the pining just becomes strongest and inmost
And sometimes unbearable
I find myself wishing that I can turn me into you
And be exactly where you are
In place and in time
I wish I could just liquefy myself and thaw my heart
And send the vapor instantly and be there sailing in corners and borders
Without being shaken, without fear and helplessness
I hope to just suddenly then become unshakable
Then become the fearless and invincible me…
But I can only be a poet for you
And I can only miss you more and more
And then be your lover forever
That would be everything I can ever be
And that would be my all.